This might not be a picnic

It's almost been a year since I tried hosting a meet with my local Lolita community for the first time. I had planned a tour of the Hasselt Fashion Museum with a casual afternoon tea at a tea room in the neighborhood. It all seemed perfectly planned, but there's a reason I said "tried." In the end I turned out to be sick so I couldn't go myself, but when I informed the attendees of me being sick almost everybody had already forgotten about the meet. Since then, I have learned a lot on how to be a better host and organizer over all. At first I thought agreeing on a place and time was more than enough, but, boy, was I wrong. I'm not blaming anyone but myself for miscommunication and lack of follow-up because that's what a good host would do (please acknowledge me learning from my mistakes). I got the idea of hosting my own meet from me feeling like there should be more Lolita meets in my very small, but very divided, country so instead of complaining about it, I took matters into my own hands. If you have ever shared that sentiment, then I suggest you keep on reading.

Afternoon Tea for Three by Charles Soulacroix

First off, I think it's very important to start off by familiarizing yourself with your local community. The reason for this being that pretty much nobody would join your event if they don't know who you are, so make sure you're an active member in the community. You can do this by going to meets hosted by others, being social in the Discord server or Facebook group chats and, of course, by wearing the fashion: no Lolita meets for non-Lolitas (imagine me wagging my finger). I'm always happy when a Lolita community uses Discord because it's less of a mess than Facebook's group system and it ensures a degree of anonymity which is always a plus. Now for your first meetup I would highly recommend going for an afternoon tea, a lunch or a non-guided visit to a museum, a zoo et cetera, because these won't require that much planning logistically speaking. Everybody can pay for their own ticket upfront or pay their own share of the bill at the end of the meal, so there would usually be little to no mess. It would also be okay if attendees were to cancel at the last minute since it wouldn't cause any problems.

The Holyday by James Tissot (1876)

Now, when it comes to ideas that would require some more planning than just agreeing on a date and a place, like swap meets, bring-and-buy sales and even picnics. I would host one of these once you've gotten more familiar with the basics of hosting, planning and, often forgotten (by me at least), enthusiasm retention. For a swap meet or a bring-and-buy sale you're going to have to make sure you have a venue. I would highly recommend checking with your local community center as they will let you rent a space for a pretty low fee. You can even ask all attendees to pitch in by treating it like a modest entry fee. This nominal fee will ensure people won't flake out at the last minute, because they will have already made a small investment. Besides that, keeping people interested in the event will almost guarantee its succes. You can do this by asking people what they're planning on wearing and sharing what your planning on wearing as well. For my upcoming meet I had decided to mail people invitations which got people pretty excited too.

The Sewing Party by Louis Lang (1893)

Another part that you cannot forget as a host is to be welcoming and social with everybody. At the start of the meet you're going to have to be the one checking for attendance. If someone might be missing or in need of extra directions, you're going to be first in line to help out. If you notice someone is struggling to be social, you're going to have to try and be a bridge. Hosting comes with a lot of responsibilities and if you feel like it might be a bit much for you, you can always ask someone else who's better at stuff like that to cohost a meet with you. That way you can split the responsibilities between you two. The next meet I'm hosting will be a tour-and-tea meet at Meir Palace in Antwerp which I had a lot of fun with planning.

Thank you, and take care!