Cringe but free

Last week a user on TikTok user with the handle @monochromehime posted a video of her combining Lolita fashion with jirai kei and ryōsangata. In my opinion, she did a great job in combining these styles by keeping it to a color palette that screams jirai kei (pink and black) whilst maintaining a lowkey Lolita silhouette that allures more towards the old school Lolita style. Besides that, her hair and makeup are typical for jirai kei like twin tails and defined tear bags. Unfortunately "jiraitwt" did not like this mixing of fashion subcultures which resulted in quite the nasty takedown by the community. I find this rather odd since any practitioner of any of these two fashion subcultures should be able to see how this is a combination of both Lolita and jirai kei. It also isn't that new of a concept because in From Kabukicho to Trocadéro I wrote that DearMyLove released a new line named DearMyLoveEmily, which marries jirai kei with Lolita. Thus, any of these people screeching into the online abyss should've maybe done their homework.

The mixing of styles in fashion has always been a thing. When it comes to J-fashion, we've seen this with sweet Lolita and Decora, resulting in what's colloquially known as "over-the-top sweet Lolita." Another example of this is the combination of sweet Lolita and Gyaru: "hime Gyaru" (Japanese: 姫ギャル, English lit.: Gyaru princess). This style then further evolved into "himekaji" (Japanese: 姫カジ abbreviated from 姫カジュアル, English lit.: casual princess). Yet, why is it that seemingly nowadays this is often frowned upon as one is supposed to strictly follow the rules in order to fit in with their subculture? Gatekeeping is a very good thing at times, but why are we treating those who have already "proven themselves" to know what is and isn't part of the subculture like total newbies? I have noticed this mainly happens online because you often don't know everyone personally so every passing face seems like a new one (there are exceptions of course).

In the Lolita community, those who are stopped at the gate are often referred to as "ita", meaning "cringe" in Japanese (Japanese: 痛, English lit.: ouch). This expression isn't used that much anymore since it's seen as rather offensive. Instead, Lolitas will do their best to give constructive criticism as to why the aspiring Lolita's coord might be considered ita. Besides that, ita has gotten a more positive connotation because of ita bags. These bags are a sign of one's dedication to a character or some intellectual property. For instance, one could create an ita bag centered around Bunny Tsukino for Sailor Moon or centered around the entire Sailor Moon franchise. I feel this is a rather fun way of interacting with something you deeply enjoy, unlike the itasha (Japanese: 痛車, English: cringe car) where you cover your entire vehicle in merch from a certain character or other intellectual property. I have noticed that ita bags are really popular in the West, but here people seemingly embraced the mindset of "I'm cringe but I am free" (I'm people), because they don't use the privacy insert.

According to ◎＠aika＠◎ on Ameba, you will be seen as ita in Lolita fashion if:

1. You're not wearing a petticoat.
2. You're not wearing bloomers.
3. You're not wearing makeup (unless you have a skin condition).
4. Your hair is messy or just put in a ponytail for example.
5. Your eyebrows are ungroomed.
6. You're wearing cosplay or pieces from Bodyline.
7. You're cosplaying a Lolita character from an anime.
8. You think Lolita fashion is the same as cosplay or maid costumes.
9. You're wearing metal-rimmed glasses.
10. You're obese.
11. You're ugly.
12. You're wearing Gyaru makeup.
13. You're hairy.
14. You're wearing a wig meant for cosplay.
15. You're wearing loafers.
16. You're wearing regular sneakers.
17. You're wearing pumps with stiletto heels.
18. You're wearing pointed-toe pumps.
19. You're wearing a JSK without a blouse or a bolero.
20. You're not wearing a coat even though it's winter.
21. Your legs are bare.
22. You're showing too much skin.
23. Your coord is mismatched.
24. You're wearing "uniform Lolita" (dressing exactly like the advertisement).
25. You're not wearing accessories.
26. Your coord is wrinkled.
27. Your coord is dirty or torn.
28. Your coord is made up of very cheap pieces.
29. You're wearing handmade pieces that look amateurish and mismatched.
30. You're wearing the wrong size.

With some of these points I truly understand where she is coming from and I definitely agree with the first point. However, that doesn't take away that most of the other points come across as fatphobic, classist (sometimes you can score some good deals on the secondhand market) or just plain mean (beauty is always in the eye of the beholder). Even though this post is from 2013, I feel that some still use this list to know what is considered ita in Lolita fashion. You can mainly see this on our 4chan imageboard /cgl/ - Cosplay & EGL where ita threads are still posted to this day. A lot of what gets posted will fit in this list:

Do they not own an iron? What a fatty-chan! She looks so ugly, it's crazy! Cringe! The absence of a petticoat isn't the only problem here. Why is this even tagged as Lolita fashion? Demonias have no place in Lolita fashion!

These comments definitely hurt if they're written about you. And if they're ever written about your coord or overall appearance, try to not let it get to you too much. The people over on 4chan enjoy their anonymity and use that as a tool to be mean about others. Maybe try to incorporate their constructive criticism, if there's any at all, and try to learn from your mistakes. 

Thank you, and take care.